Where did the handshake in men come from. Handshake rules. What does the handshake say? Different types of handshakes and their meaning

A handshake between two people can really be much more truthful and informative - even thousands of words.

The habit of shaking hands as a gesture of greeting is present in almost all cultures. But if in ancient times the greeting ritual of different nations could differ significantly, now, in the era of globalization of any processes, including cultural ones, we have received a universal and fairly standard way to greet another person - a handshake.

But only at first glance - this simple action is typical and does not contain any individuality. In fact, there are a lot of handshake options. And depending on the situation, attitude to the interlocutor and the nature of the situation, each of us chooses one way or another to shake hands with another person.

Based on the characteristics of the greeting, one can draw conclusions about how people who greet each other actually relate to each other, what emotions they experience, what they intend to do. Many of these hidden signals are unknown not only to outside observers, but also to the participants in the greeting ritual.

And now we will consider all types and characteristics handshakes, which can be very useful in life - and when you try to understand who is in charge among politicians, how colleagues, boss or relatives treat you.

Hand position during a handshake

First of all, it is worth starting with the position of the hands during the handshake. With a standard handshake, which has a neutral character, the hands of the greeting participants are in the same position. They are perpendicular to the surface of the earth and the degree of the angle in the area elbow joint everyone will be about the same.

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Such a handshake indicates a neutral attitude of those who greet each other. In any case, the participants of the greeting do not experience any vivid emotions. People shaking hands in this way are prone to compromise, rational behavior (unless their handshake is overly forceful, but more on that later).

The handshake shown in the figure below has a completely different meaning. The hand of one person is turned down, and the second, on the contrary, looks up with the open part. These are examples of classic opposite types of behavior. Member A demonstrates his arrogant attitude towards participant B, which in turn demonstrates a willingness to obey.

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On the left is participant B, on the right is participant A

Position participant A often indicates powerful and authoritarian personalities. IN this case we can say that A shows his authority, his higher social status. This does not always correspond to the actual state of affairs. Rather, desired. After all, people endowed with power and authority do not often demonstrate them - even with such, almost unconscious gestures. So their handshake is often neutral.

This type of handshake often indicates a desire to get something from your interlocutor. Moreover, we are talking mainly about intangible acquisitions. Member A may be aimed at obtaining confirmation of submission, agreement with some opinion or attitude. Position participant B says the opposite. Such a handshake speaks of the demonstrated friendliness, peacefulness, readiness to make concessions, readiness to sacrifice one's interests and resources for the interests and goals of the interlocutor. People who give their hand in this way seek to find the favor of their greeting partner and are ready to step on the throat of their pride for this. This type of handshake is called the "sycophant handshake". The natural enhancers of such a sycophantic position are the outstretched arm, the bent back, the ingratiating smile, the half-bent knees.

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Sometimes we have to deal with the fact that we give a hand for a neutral handshake, and our partner demonstrates participant A's position, seeking to drive us deeper under the plinth and force us to make a "sycophant handshake." What to do in such a situation?

The answer lies in the realm of non-verbal communication. It is necessary to take half a step towards your unfriendly interlocutor, without tearing your hands. This will cause the interlocutor to turn his hand to a normal vertical position. Then you can take a step back and only then stop the handshake. Thus, your interlocutor at an unconscious level will be rebuffed, and this will make him treat you more carefully and respectfully. The effect can be enhanced by a "friendly" pat on the shoulder or by touching the interlocutor's hand with the left hand. Usually, after such contact, an unfriendly interlocutor looks discouraged and does not show any signs of authoritarian behavior.

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Second hand during a handshake

When shaking hands, not only the hand with which you greet is important, but also the left hand (if you are right-handed), since it expresses the attitude towards the interlocutor much more accurately.

Let's start from a neutral position. The left hand is relaxed and hangs along the body. There is no point in interpreting anything here. Normal relationship. Nothing extraordinary should be expected from a person whose left hand is not involved in any way at the time of the handshake.

If the interlocutor begins to connect the left hand to the handshake process, this indicates that the process begins to carry more emotions and more personal relationships. In such cases, likes and dislikes, hidden and explicit intentions, a desire to show sympathy, provide support, get rid of someone else's presence, or a desire to enter into closer relationships are manifested.

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In ordinary communication, the distance at which communication takes place matters. The further away the interlocutor is from you, the more formal, neutral your relationship is. The closer he comes, the warmer feelings he expects. The exception, of course, is the option with a deliberately extremely negative attitude, when we shorten the distance not out of a desire to hug, but out of a desire to strangle the interlocutor.

In a handshake, the distance value remains the same. Especially when we use the left hand in the ritual.

To begin, consider touch in the area of ​​the hand. Far distance.

In this case, touching the hand is a sign that not the closest relationship has been established between the interlocutors. Most likely, they are in the nature of one-time social transactions. The interlocutor, touching with his free hand the brush of another person, is not currently in close relations with him, they feel distance.

Now let's take a closer look at various types touches.

1. During a handshake, your interlocutor grabs your hand with his left hand. Such a position is called "grip grip".

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Although such capture is perceived mostly negatively, it nevertheless has a positive meaning. Thus, the interlocutor expresses his best disposition. Depending on the strength of the handshake, one can also talk about the delight of the meeting, which overwhelms a person. The stronger they shake your hand, holding it in a "glove", the greater the joy they experience from communicating with you. Such a handshake is often awarded to pop and movie stars.

Additional markers confirming this mood are the distance and inclination of the interlocutor's body.

A long distance speaks of a cautious, one might even say touching attitude. But if the hand fell into such a grip, and the interlocutor approached a very short distance, this means that some preferences are expected from you: acceptance, relative position, reciprocal signs of attention.

If, after such a handshake, your interlocutor brings his palms folded together to his face, as if covering his lower part, we can say that he experiences incredible delight from the meeting.

2. Palm from below

In this case, the interlocutor's left hand is like a platform on which your hands rest when shaking hands. This situation speaks of an unconscious desire to provide support, help, console, help with advice. In fact, this gesture demonstrates a willingness to help. If you are faced with this position of the hands, no doubt you can ask for help from your interlocutor - he will help.

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3. Palm on top

The palm of the left hand, covering your hand from above at the moment of shaking hands, means an expression of care and participation.

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This is almost always true when the handshake is between people of different genders or ages. At the same time, if you observe such a position of hands during a handshake between two men of approximately the same age and social status, then the situation can be completely opposite.

Also in this case, you need to pay attention to the context of the situation. If a person puts his palm on top immediately during a handshake, then, probably, we are talking about expressing deep positive feelings towards the interlocutor. If this gesture is formed as a response to any words or movements that have already arisen in the course of the conversation (and the hands do not break contact), then most likely this indicates an attempt to show one's ego, a desire to show who is in charge here.

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The handshake is done in the manner of equal partners, but there are two nuances that point to the superiority of Obama. 1. With his left hand, Obama pats Yatsenyuk on the shoulder. This is a gesture of intrusion into the personal space of a communication partner. Yatsenyuk does not make similar attempts, which only strengthens the effect of Obama's influence. 2. Yatsenyuk's back is so tense that it seems that he stretched out in front of Obama like a rookie in front of a sergeant. In general, the photograph demonstrates Yatsenyuk's tension and his recognition of the higher status of his interlocutor. However, one should not get carried away with interpretations and argue that Yatsenyuk is demonstrating some signs of submission. There is respect, there is tension in the pose, there is tightness, but subordination is on this photo missing

In addition, such a gesture can also occur as a result of a reaction to the unfriendly behavior of the interlocutor or his intrusion into the intimate zone.

Is there a difference between the position of the palm below and above? Undoubtedly. A person who places his palm on the bottom is more inclined to provide any help and support that you ask for. But the person whose palm is on top usually already understands perfectly well what exactly you will need and useful at this moment and in this situation. That is, the difference between the location of the palms reflects the presence or absence of an initiative position. The palm below is a sign of acceptance of your initiative. The palm on top is a sign of readiness to take your own initiative.

This is not always the case. Body position can turn this interpretation on its head.

Touching the interlocutor. Close range

A person can touch the interlocutor with his left hand both in the area of ​​​​the forearm and in the area of ​​\u200b\u200bthe elbow joint. And in some cases, we place our hand on the shoulder or even put an arm around the back of the one we greet.

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This is where the laws of distance come into play. The closer to the body is the place where the hand of your interlocutor is fixed, the greater the need for communication he feels. Touching the forearm and touching the shoulder have different degrees of expression of those feelings. The most extreme degree is, of course, hugs. Well, or patting the interlocutor on the back.

Do not forget that hugs can also be of the nature of subcultural features. Young people of athletic appearance who greet each other with strong hugs do not always feel too warm feelings for each other. Most likely, this type of greeting is a consequence of their own rituals. They are so accepted. In any case, to assess the relationship of people by their handshake, one should take into account the context of the situation, the influence of cultural and social characteristics.

The strength and duration of the handshake

In addition to the handshake itself, several other factors are important.

1. The power of the handshake. The stronger they shake your hand, the more emotional energy the interlocutor is ready to pour into communication. At the same time, a sluggish handshake is not yet a sign of hostility. Maybe the person just doesn't feel well. And a strong handshake, respectively, is not always a sign of a complacent disposition. The strength of compression indicates only the willingness to spend a certain amount of muscle energy during communication with you. But what will be the nature of the application of this energy depends on completely different factors.

2. Duration of contact. There is a direct correlation with the time that the interlocutor is willing to spend communicating with you. The longer he shakes your hand, the longer the conversation he expects. The shorter the handshake, the faster the opponent is ready to "resolve" all issues and do other, more important things. Often a short handshake indicates the desire of your interlocutor to quickly move on to resolving the issue for which you met. In this case, brevity will indicate a reluctance to waste time on formal procedures.

Interpretation errors

When you analyze non-verbal communication, you understand that not a single gesture and not a single sign is one hundred percent reliable. Moreover, sometimes the same gesture in different situations can be completely opposite.

In order to make fewer mistakes in the interpretation of gestures (and it will not be possible to completely get rid of them), you always need to make allowances for the context of the situation, the characteristics of the culture and social group, and the combination of gesture with posture and facial expressions. But the key features of the handshake in most cases remain unchanged.

The main thing:

1. The handshake expresses the attitude towards the interlocutor. And if a person can lie in words, then through a handshake, the truth is much more likely to be correctly interpreted.

2. Handshake distance means only how much they intend to contact you. A short distance does not necessarily mean a positive location.

3. The stronger the handshake, the greater the desire to make contact. And the more emotions overwhelm your interlocutor.

4. The main signs of a formal handshake are: long distance, sluggish handshake, short hand contact time. This indicates a lack of interest in communication.

5. If the left hand is used in a handshake, this is a sign that the interlocutor puts more personal relationship into contact with you than in other cases and with other people.

I also propose to watch and try to analyze the video of real and interesting handshakes of President Petro Poroshenko with Catherine Ashton, Vladimir Putin, Nursultan Nazarbayev and Alexander Lukashenko in Minsk - using only acquired knowledge.

And now - check the conclusions drawn. So, Ashton expresses his support for Poroshenko by performing a “glove” handshake gesture, covering the palm of the Ukrainian president from above. Poroshenko shows a positive attitude towards Ashton by smiling, but the time of eye contact with her is very short. Before the handshake with Ashton is over, his eyes are already on Putin.

The handshake with Putin is defiantly cold. Too sharp, theatrical transition from a smile addressed to Ashton, to tense walking jaws and a petrified look addressed to Putin.

In the next second, the tension in Poroshenko's posture begins to subside and the duty handshake with Nazarbayev is already taking place under the auspices of a slight smile. And Lukashenka gets all the emotional stash from Poroshenko - both a smile, and a turn of the body shoulder to shoulder, and a caring "glove" when shaking hands.

The conclusion is that Poroshenko's coldness towards Putin is feigned, emphasized, somewhat exaggerated. And this was done in contrast to the smiles of other participants in the meeting, specifically to emphasize the negative attitude towards him.

There is a version that by shaking hands or moving hands resembling a handshake, our distant ancestors wanted to demonstrate that there were no weapons in their hands. In Russia, this method of greeting is most common among men; women usually use it only during business meetings.

There is a version that with a handshake or a movement of hands resembling a handshake, our distant ancestors wanted to demonstrate that they had no weapons in their hands. In Russia, this method of greeting is most common among men; women usually use it only during business meetings.

What does a handshake mean?
A handshake is a symbolic gesture that is used when greeting, parting, congratulating, concluding an agreement or as a sign of reconciliation. This gesture consists in a slight squeeze of the right or left hands and may be accompanied by their slight swaying.

How should you shake hands?
When shaking hands with the person you decide to greet in this way, you need to look directly into the eyes and do not look away, at least until you open your hands. Press your hand firmly, but without force. Do not leave your palm open, fingers should not hang in the air. The nature of the handshake can set the tone for all subsequent communication, so don't underestimate its importance.
It is usually not customary to shake hands in the toilet, in the bathhouse, in the dining room. In the dining room, this is especially true when one person is already sitting at the table and eating, and the second is just coming up.

How to determine the character of a person by a handshake?
Many experts argue that a person's character can be determined by the handshake of a person.
So, for example, if a sluggish, lifeless hand was extended to you for a handshake, perhaps a person is in front of you, possessing weak character and lack of self-confidence. Too strong handshake (to the crunch of fingers) characterizes tough and aggressive person: He deliberately causes inconvenience and even pain, wanting to demonstrate his strength and ability to apply pressure.
Calm, balanced people with adequate self-esteem give a hand firmly enough, but not too hard. If you feel that the hand given in this way is very suitable for ours, in front of you self-confident person. He knows what he wants, but he also knows how to adapt to other people.
The manner of greeting with a “frozen”, as if wooden, hand betrays a tough person who is not ready to meet halfway and demands that others adapt to him.
If the handshake feels like a grip and you have to jerk your hand a little to free yourself, it is likely that you are facing - a person with a pronounced possessive instinct.
If a person not close to, he can demonstrate a kind of truncated handshake: he gives his partner only the tips of his fingers, protecting his palm from girth with his thumb. ABOUT trying to keep a distance the reverse situation also speaks, when a person shakes your outstretched hand not completely, but only fingers. Reluctance to get close a person also demonstrates if he stretches his straight arm far forward, expanding the space between you.
When the hand is extended from the side in a wide gesture, this is a typical friendly handshake, showing a certain closeness of relations, informality of communication. But this gesture contains a swing, which in a situation with an unfamiliar person can be regarded as aggression. If a person absolutely always exchanges such a handshake, it is likely that he rustic, not tactful enough, prone to impose oneself.
However, the type of handshake may depend not only on the character of the person, not only on his attitude towards the interlocutor, but also on his mood in this moment, so sometimes you should not jump to conclusions about his intentions.

Andrey Vetoshkin

What does the handshake say? Some attach too little importance to the handshake: they perform it somehow, without looking into the eyes and without enthusiasm.

And then they wonder why completely different guys turn out to be the favorites of the authorities, and it’s impossible to become the soul of the company.

As the scientists found out, half the success of the planned business depends on the correct contact of hands and accompanying gestures.

This tradition exists in many countries, however, each nation brings its own unique features and "chips" to it. What is the custom of the African Maasai to spit on their hands with relish before touching!

Muslims, after shaking hands, bring their hand to the very heart, and the Arabians kiss on both cheeks. And only the Japanese will be offended by an outstretched hand in hope: it is customary for them to bow without invading personal space.

The fact is that strength,with which you shake hands and energy,which you are passing, can tell you a lot about your character partner.

So, the tighter a man squeezes his hand, the stronger, it turns out, his sexual activity. At all, grip strength will say a lot about your health: the more newtons, less likely to die soon, stroke or heart attack.

It may seem to you that you yourself decide how to shake someone else's hand. But heredity has already decided everything for you!

Turns out, children and grandchildren shake hands in the same way, like fathers and grandfathers. These are all genetic traits. The stronger the squeeze, the better your genes.

In addition, this gesture is influenced by character (introvert or extrovert), physical training, upbringing, and even ... nutrition.

How do business relationships start?

Of course, with a handshake. Sluggish or cheerful, sincere or indifferent, bright or mean.

What does a partner's handshake say? Look at how they give you a hand: palm down, up, or strictly vertically, with an edge?

With a vertical layout a person subconsciously hopes for equal fruitful cooperation.

But giving a hand "shirt up", as if "paternally" covering yours, he strives for leadership. Such a person will want to subjugate you, he is clearly aiming for leadership.

If a man gives his hand palm up(as if asking for alms), he hints that he is ready to obey your instructions.

Maybe this is a modest, driven nature, or a person who is used to flattering, fawning and hiding behind someone else's back.

Formula for success

Of great importance are the look, smile and other gestures of a person standing on the opposite side.

One scientist (his name is Geoffrey Beatty) put forward theory of the perfect handshake. If you want to make the right impression, study it carefully and practice in front of a mirror.

So, first meet the "opponent" with your eyes. This is followed by a lively greeting and a sincere smile. Only after that, vigorously reach out and firmly squeeze the palm of your partner.

Break the handshake after two, maximum three seconds. Everyone wants to get rid of too long hand shaking as soon as possible.

If your palm is sticky and wet, your handshake is sluggish and lifeless, and your eyes look to the side, you are unlikely to seem confident and reliable person to the interlocutor.

Incidentally, it has been observed that introverted natures always greet sluggishly. They are self-absorbed and pay little attention to worldly customs. Therefore, they are not known in the eyes of others as successful and active people.

However, Turks, Pakistanis, Africans and residents of the Middle East would really like them: it is not customary to tightly squeeze someone else's hand there.

Little tricks of big people

You have probably noticed that some strangers fascinate you from the very first minute. Somehow, they immediately dispose to themselves and after an hour they become best friends.

Pay attention to non-verbal gestures with which your acquaintance began. Very often people, versed in psychology and eager to become pleasant conversationalists,use some tricks.

In addition to smiling and making eye contact, they may grab your hand with both hands, squeeze it, or shake it slightly when shaking hands. Or, squeezing your hand with theirs, they will hug you with another, pull you to them and pat on the shoulder.

All these skin-to-skin contacts are recorded on a subconscious level as manifestations of friendly feelings. Shake the hand - and already do not have a soul in the interlocutor!

This shows openness, cordiality, readiness for further contact. But even when shaking hands, people who consider themselves well-mannered adhere to certain rules regarding the question of who first gives a hand when greeting. What does etiquette prescribe?

Why is it customary to extend a hand when meeting?

The custom of shaking hands at a meeting came to us from ancient times. Moreover, in each period of time, this gesture was attributed various meanings. There is a hypothesis that in primitive tribes, a handshake among men was a kind of test of strength: whoever shakes hands harder, he is stronger. Such a short duel began each meeting. In some other tribes, the willingness of a man to extend his hand showed the purity of his intentions: the hand is outstretched, the palm is open, there is no weapon in it, which means that there is no need to be afraid of this person.

In ancient Rome, people were good at cunning, and an outstretched hand did not always mean friendliness. Warriors learned to hide a small dagger in their sleeve, and with a normal handshake it could be overlooked. Therefore, the descriptions mention the custom of shaking the wrist, not the palm. At first this was done for security reasons, then it became a tradition: when meeting a man, holding his hands at waist level, they squeezed each other's wrists.

But in Japan, samurai shook hands before a duel, and this gesture told the enemy: "Prepare for death."

The meaning of the handshake today

In those distant times, people did not attach importance to who was the first to give a hand. The handshake became generally accepted and regulated by the rules of etiquette only in the 19th century. Only men could shake hands with each other; this gesture was not characteristic of women and was considered tactless. Later, shaking hands became popular in business circles: they sealed deals, showed a disposition for further communication. There's nothing wrong with shaking hands with a lady these days, especially if it's in a business setting.

The custom of shaking hands when meeting is more common in Europe and America. In Asia, it is less popular: there a bow or a certain folding of hands is considered a sign of respect. But in business circles in Asian countries, a handshake is also appropriate.

when meeting

In most cases, a person cannot introduce himself: he must be introduced. A man is supposed to be introduced to a woman. Those who are younger in age - persons who are older. A person who occupies a higher position in society is represented by someone who is at a lower level. This is considered an indicator of education. If you need to introduce your family to colleagues or friends, then they call their spouse and children, and with them they introduce friends or colleagues as a sign of respect for older age. Who is the first to give a hand when meeting? It is the person to whom others are introduced, regardless of gender and age.

Can you introduce yourself?

Are there situations when it is appropriate for a person to introduce himself strangers? Yes, it is possible, for example, at a business dinner, a banquet, a party for the purpose of settling. In this case, it is permissible to approach the person of interest, introduce yourself, name the field of activity and the company, and hold out a business card.

If you need to introduce yourself to a woman who is in the company of a man, then you should first get to know her gentleman and then only be introduced to the lady.

Acquaintance is not only about shaking hands. A good-natured, friendly smile and a direct look into the face of the interlocutor are very important. It is considered bad manners to look away while dating.

A few "no", or How not to be considered ignorant

Yes, yes, ignorance of these seemingly trifles can make a person ignorant in a matter of seconds. So, when meeting and at any meeting, according to the generally accepted rules of politeness, one should not:

• do not shake the outstretched hand (this can be perceived as the deepest insult);
• giving a hand, keep the other in your pocket;
• hold a cigarette in your hand (in general, it is undesirable to hold anything in your hands, especially when shaking hands);
• leave a gloved hand when greeting a lady (a woman can leave a glove if it is part of the toilet; a glove, but not a mitten!);
• look around, at the floor or up, show indifference;
• when meeting a group of people, give a hand to only one of them;
• stay seated when meeting a lady or an older person, especially if they are standing;
• dont know simple rules about who is the first to give a handshake.

Greetings at an unexpected meeting

Almost every hour we greet someone: neighbors to the saleswoman, from whom we buy coffee every morning, colleagues, close or hardly known people, relatives ... Who is the first to give a hand when greeting? How not to put yourself or the interlocutor in an awkward position? Let's consider several cases.

If acquaintances met on the street or in a public place, you should not express your emotions too violently and attract the attention of others. Seeing a familiar person in the distance, you can limit yourself to a nod or a wave of your hand. If the distance allows, a handshake and a short exchange of phrases are appropriate (do not start a long conversation, because a person may be in a hurry somewhere). Who is the first to give a hand when meeting? Etiquette prescribes this initiative to someone who is older in age or occupies a more important social position.

At an unexpected meeting with a loved one, short hugs, pats, in some countries even kisses on the cheek or a cheek-to-cheek gesture are appropriate. But if you met a business partner, a person older than you or a distant acquaintance, such manifestations of emotions can be regarded as familiarity.

Can a woman be the first to give a hand?

Who gives a hand first, a man or a woman? only a lady can shake hands. A man is supposed to either shake an outstretched hand or bring it to his lips for a kiss. In past centuries, it was permissible to kiss the hand only of a married lady, but in modern etiquette there are no such restrictions.

Greeting a stranger

Is it necessary to greet people you barely know? Yes! Even if you don't remember the person's name or can't remember where you saw their face, it's still best to be polite and say hello. Of course, in this case, it is enough to say a greeting, nod or raise your hat. Stormy manifestations of joy will look unnatural, and therefore completely unnecessary.

Greeting at a scheduled meeting

Suppose we are talking about a meeting of acquaintances at a party, in a restaurant, at a social reception, in a theater, or any public place. Is not chance meeting on the run, and going to an event, a person knows who he will meet there. How should one behave and who is the first to give a hand at a meeting? In this case, the first one to come up and say hello is supposed to be the one who is younger or occupies a smaller position. But when it comes to who is the first to give a hand - the elder or the younger - then the one who is older shows this initiative.

Welcome rules

When you come to visit, you must definitely say hello to the owner of the house and the guests present. The owner should shake hands, and greeting the rest, you can limit yourself to a bow and greeting phrases. It is more appropriate for the hostess to kiss her hand.

When meeting with a group of people, it is not necessary to shake hands with everyone, a general bow is enough. But if you shake hands with one of these people, you should shake hands with everyone else. Who is the first to give a hand when greeting in this case? One who approaches the group. Before shaking hands, gloves should be removed, as well as a hat.

If you have to say hello to people sitting at the table, holding out your hand across the table is considered a sign of bad manners. It is more polite to confine yourself to a verbal greeting or a slight bow.

In a situation where people greeting each other have a noticeable age difference, the question often arises: who is the first to give a hand - the oldest or the youngest? The rules of etiquette say that only the oldest in age can take the initiative in shaking hands. The same rule applies to people who are at different levels of the career ladder: the one who is higher in rank extends his hand.

Rules of greeting in business

Business courtesy rules follow the same principles. The first to greet is the one who is lower in rank. If a person enters a room where there is already a group of people, then the person who enters greets him first - regardless of position or age.

Who is the first to give a hand when greeting during a business communication? In reverse order, from top to bottom. We must not forget general rule: shaking the hand of one person suggests the same gesture in relation to other persons. Otherwise, you should limit yourself to polite words and a general nod of the head.

In the case when a subordinate enters the office of the boss, the latter may not interrupt his affairs or conversation, but according to the rules of politeness, he must greet the person who has entered with words or at least a gesture. In the opposite situation, when the boss enters the subordinate, it is supposed to interrupt the conversation or business (if any, and this will not be incorrect in relation to a third person) and pay attention to the leader.

Let's summarize what has been said

Etiquette is a delicate matter, but quite logical, because all the rules of good manners are subject to one thing: do not offend another person, behave in such a way that communication is mutually pleasant. If you happen to get confused in ranks and age, if you are afraid to seem impolite, offend by chance, you should remember one more rule: the one who first gives a hand when shaking hands will be more polite, who will be the first to say hello, who will be the first to show attention. If you are in doubt whether to say hello or not - say hello, whether to extend your hand or not - stretch it. Let you be known as a person who has forgotten any subtlety of etiquette, but you will show cordiality and respect.

But there is one simple scheme that helps you remember who is supposed to be the first to say hello and who should be the first to shake hands according to etiquette. We greet each other according to the principle "from smallest to largest" (the junior - with the elder, the subordinate - with the boss, the man - with the woman). We extend our hand according to the principle "from largest to smallest", since a handshake is a kind of privilege, an honorary sign of attention, and this gesture is supposed to be made by a more "important" person (the elder holds out his hand to the younger, the boss to the subordinate, the woman to the man).

In addition to the handshake, do not forget about the kind words of welcome, gestures and a friendly smile - an absolute trump card in any communication!

A handshake is accepted in a male environment, for some reason women rarely shake hands with each other. It turns out that this custom is not so simple, according to the manner and strength of the handshake, one can draw important conclusions and obtain significant information about a person.

A handshake is a familiar greeting gesture, a sign of peace and respect. Apparently, the tradition of shaking hands at a meeting in antiquity was born, when people who did not have aggressive plans demonstrated that they did not have weapons. This meaning has long been lost, but the habit of shaking hands has been preserved. The inquisitive minds of scientists have reached this area. In the course of the study, many amazing facts were revealed.

The smell of a handshake

It's not just animals that share scents. It turns out that with the help of handshakes, we unconsciously study smells. This conclusion is based on the results of the experiment. 300 people were invited to the meeting. Some were greeted with a handshake. Then the researchers tracked the behavior of the test subjects using a hidden camera: “handshakes” brought their hand to their nose twice as often as the rest. Scientists have found that when palms touch, people exchange chemicals.

What can be learned by shaking hands

Scientists at the University of Alabama argue that the strength of the handshake can be used to judge the type of personality. they shake hands uncertainly and weakly, but they behave much more energetically, leaving a positive impression of themselves. By this gesture, you can determine the mood of the interlocutor. So, a person giving a hand in such a way that it is on top intends to control the situation. If the interlocutor holds out a brush with the palm up, he is ready to obey. Palms that meet vertically speak of a mood for equal relations.

One proper handshake is as effective as three hours of negotiations. Scientists seeking to measure and classify everything in the world have built a formula for the perfect handshake. We will not bore you with unnecessary sophistication - it is unlikely that you will use this knowledge in life. In general, the secret of success is simple: look into the eyes of the interlocutor, smile sincerely, shake hands firmly, without holding the opponent’s palm for more than three seconds.

Scientists from Canada have proven that the nature of the handshake can be used to judge health and biological age person. We don’t know if you can use the information from Canadian experts, but the handshake force of a person full of strength is 300 newtons, and each decrease in this indicator by 50 newtons increases the risk of death by 16%. The manner of shaking hands is inherited: 65% in this gesture are determined by genetics, 35% depend on upbringing and well-being. Psychologists are inclined to think that an energetic handshake indicates good heredity.

Differences in tradition

National features of handshakes are much more diverse than one might think. The Swedes have the strongest handshake, and Pakistani men have the weakest handshake. For most Europeans, a firm handshake is considered good form, but in the countries of the Middle East and in Turkey this is not accepted - well-mannered people only indicate a gesture with a weak grip on the palm. In Africa, a friendly disposition is shown by shaking hands with both hands, but it is unacceptable to squeeze the hand strongly.

In some countries, the ritual varies depending on the social position. In South Korea, the hand extended by the boss must be taken in both palms, and with one hand you can only greet friends.

Muslims cannot shake hands between a woman and a man, since Islam forbids touching a member of the opposite sex if he is not your relative.

Residents of the UK rarely shake hands and almost never say goodbye. But the Germans and Swiss shake hands at every opportunity.

Tradition Saudi Arabia: the owner of the house first shakes the guest's palm, then puts his left hand on his shoulder and kisses him on both cheeks. In some Muslim countries, after shaking hands, it is customary to put the right hand to the heart. There are some very strange customs for us. For example, the Maasai living in Africa spit on their hand before giving it, while in the Congo they blow on their hands. The Japanese have an outstretched hand - a sign of aggression, in this country people bow to each other when they meet.

Handshake Rules

This seemingly formality is important, because our first impression of a person often depends on a gesture. A handshake eloquently speaks of interest or, conversely, of complete indifference, express weakness or confidence, demonstrate sincerity or intention to hide something. With this informative gesture, we send a subtle but powerful impulse about our intentions.

If you strive to make a favorable impression and create the right mood from the first seconds of communication, master the rules of handshakes.

• Assess the situation before you reach out to say hello. There are no hard and fast rules, but there are some restrictions. For example, if a person is significantly older and higher than you in status, it is appropriate to wait for the first movement on his part. The same applies to communicating with strangers. Keep in mind that a handshake is a special sign that should not be used in all cases without exception. Shake hands with people who are significant to you, respected and those who pay special attention.
• A sluggish handshake is evidence of lack of will, lack of interest, or insecurity. An energetic handshake should not be excessively strong. Your task is not to demonstrate strength, but to indicate a friendly disposition.
• Choose a distance not too large so that the interlocutor does not get the impression that you are pushing him away, but not too short, as if you want to pull the person close to you. Such cordiality will be appropriate when meeting with friends.
• Your palm should not be wet. Everyone knows the feeling of touching a not quite dry and cool hand. When going to an important meeting, wash your hands thoroughly and do not squeeze them. If you know about your problem and are not sure that you can keep your hands dry, it is better to use deodorant or put a dry tissue in your pocket to wipe your hand discreetly.
• When shaking hands, look into the eyes so as not to give the impression of a dishonest or insincere person.
• Never hold out your hand palm down - this is a gesture of superiority that no one can please.
• The hand turned palm up indicates your willingness to obey.
• The optimal number of shaking hands in a handshake is three, but never extend the greeting to more than seven.
• If you are offered a hand in greeting while you are sitting, stand up to show respect for the person.
• When greeting each other with a handshake, men must remove their gloves, regardless of the weather. According to the rules of etiquette, women may not take off their gloves on the street, but indoors they also bare their hands.
• Politicians often use the "Glove" handshake, in which one of the interlocutors covers the palm of the other with both hands. This demonstrates openness and purity of intentions. However, when meeting, you should not use the “Glove”, since this technique causes the opposite effect - people are alert and reluctant to make contact.
• Designed for handshake right hand, this rule works even for lefties. But if your right hand, for example, is dirty, you can stretch out your left hand, while explaining the reason for this behavior.
• When a woman and a man meet, according to the rules of etiquette, the first hand, if desired, is extended by the woman.
• When people meet different ages, senior decides whether there will be a handshake.
• When introduced, the person introduced is the first to give a hand.
• If a hand is extended to you, it is good manners to respond to the greeting. Ignoring a hand hanging in the air is regarded as an insult.
• When approaching a group of people, one of whom you know, shake hands with each person present.
• In order not to get confused in the hands when two couples meet, use the following rule: traditionally, women stand to the right of men, and they shake hands first, then men, after which men can shake hands.

Remember that it is completely unacceptable to greet everyone with a handshake. This greeting can be compared with the appeal to "you" to close people and "you" - for everyone else.