Where did the men handshake come from? Handshake rules. What is the handshake talking about? Different types of handshakes and their meaning

A handshake of two people can really be much more truthful and informative - even a thousand words.

The habit of shaking hands as a gesture of greeting is present in almost all cultures. But if in ancient times the ritual of greeting among different peoples could differ significantly, now, in the era of globalization of any processes, including cultural ones, we have received a universal and fairly standard way to greet another person - a handshake.

But only at first glance - this simple action is typical and does not contain any individuality. In fact, there are a lot of options for a handshake. And depending on the situation, attitude towards the interlocutor and the nature of the situation, each of us chooses one way or another to shake hands with another person.

Based on the characteristics of the greeting, one can draw conclusions about how people who greet each other really relate to each other, what emotions they experience, and what they intend to take. Many of these hidden signals are unknown not only to outside observers, but also to the participants in the greeting ritual.

And now we will consider all the types and characteristics of handshakes, which can even come in handy in life - and when you try to understand who is in charge among politicians, how your colleagues, boss or relatives treat you.

Hand position during handshake

First of all, it is worth starting with the position of the hands during the handshake. In a standard handshake, which has a neutral character, the hands of the participants in the greeting are in the same position. They are perpendicular to the surface of the earth and the degree of angle in the area of ​​the elbow joint will be approximately the same for everyone.

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Such a handshake indicates a neutral attitude of those who greet each other. In any case, the participants in the greeting do not experience any vivid emotions. People who shake hands in this way are prone to compromise, rational behavior (unless their handshake is too strong, but more on that later).

The handshake depicted in the figure below has a completely different meaning. The hand of one person is turned down, and the other, on the contrary, looks with the open part up. These are examples of classic opposing behaviors. Participant A demonstrates his arrogant attitude towards participant B, which in turn demonstrates a willingness to obey.

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Participant B on the left, participant A on the right

Position participant A often indicates powerful and authoritarian personalities. In this case, we can say that A shows his authority, his higher social status. This does not always correspond to the actual state of affairs. Rather, the desired. After all, people endowed with power and authority do not often demonstrate them - even with such, almost unconscious gestures. So their handshake is often neutral.

This type of handshake is often indicative of a desire to get something from the other person. Moreover, we are talking mainly about intangible acquisition. Participant A can be aimed at obtaining confirmation of subordination, agreement with some opinion or attitude. Position participant B says otherwise. Such a handshake speaks of the demonstrated friendliness, peacefulness, willingness to make concessions, willingness to sacrifice one's interests and resources for the sake of the interests and goals of the interlocutor. People who shake hands in this way seek to find the location of their greeting partner and are ready to step on the throat of their pride for this. This type of handshake is called a sneak handshake. Natural amplifiers of such a sycophantic position are an outstretched arm, a bent back, an ingratiating smile, and half-bent knees.

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Sometimes we have to deal with the fact that we give a hand for a neutral handshake, and our partner demonstrates position of participant A, trying to drive us deeper under the plinth and force us to make a "sneak handshake." What to do in such a situation?

The answer lies in the realm of non-verbal communication. It is necessary to do half a step to your unfriendly interlocutor, without tearing your hands. This will cause the interlocutor to turn their hand to a normal upright position. Then you can take a step back and only then stop shaking hands. Thus, your interlocutor on an unconscious level will be rebuffed, and this will make him treat you more carefully and respectfully. The effect can be enhanced by a "friendly" pat on the shoulder or by touching the interlocutor's hand with the left hand. Usually, after such contact, the unfriendly interlocutor looks discouraged and does not show any signs of authoritarian behavior.

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Second hand during handshake

When shaking hands, it is not only the hand with which you are greeting that matters, but also the left hand (if you are right-handed), since it expresses the attitude towards the interlocutor much more accurately.

Let's start with a neutral position. The left arm is relaxed and hangs along the body. It doesn't make sense to interpret anything here. The usual equal attitude. You should not expect anything extraordinary from a person whose left hand is not involved in any way at the time of the handshake.

If the interlocutor begins to connect his left hand to the handshake process, this indicates that the process begins to carry more emotions and more personal attitude. In such cases, sympathies and antipathies, hidden and explicit intentions, a desire to show sympathy, provide support, get rid of someone else's presence or a desire to enter into a closer relationship are manifested.

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In ordinary communication, the distance at which communication takes place matters. The further away from you the interlocutor is, the more formal, neutral your relationship is. The closer he comes, the warmer feelings he expects. The exception, of course, is the variant with a deliberately extremely negative attitude, when we reduce the distance not out of a desire to hug, but out of a desire to strangle the interlocutor.

In the handshake, the distance value remains the same. Especially when we use our left hand in the ritual.

First, consider touches in the area of ​​the hand. Long distance.

In this case, touching the hand serves as a sign that not the closest relationships have been established between the interlocutors. Most likely, they are in the nature of one-time social transactions. The interlocutor who touches the other person's hand with his free hand is not currently in a close relationship with him, they feel the distance.

Now let's take a closer look at the different types of touch.

1. During the handshake, your interlocutor grabs your wrist with his left hand. This situation is called "grip glove".

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Despite the fact that such a seizure is perceived mostly negatively, it nevertheless has a positive meaning. In this way, the interlocutor expresses his best disposition. Depending on the strength of the handshake, one can also talk about the delight of the meeting, which overwhelms a person. The harder they shake your hand, holding it in the "glove", the more joy they experience from communicating with you. Such a handshake is often awarded to pop and movie stars.

Additional markers confirming this mood are the distance and tilt of the interlocutor's body.

A great distance speaks of a cautious, one might even say touching attitude. But if the hand got into such a grip, and the interlocutor approached a very short distance, this means that some preferences are expected from you: acceptance, mutual disposition, reciprocal signs of attention.

If, after such a handshake, your interlocutor brings his palms together to his face, as if covering its lower part, we can say that he is incredibly delighted with the meeting.

2. Palm underneath

In this case, the interlocutor's left hand is like a platform on which your hands rest when shaking hands. This situation speaks of an unconscious desire to provide support, help, comfort, help with advice. In fact, this gesture demonstrates a willingness to help. If you are faced with this hand position, no doubt you can ask your interlocutor for help - he will help.

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3. Palm on top

The palm of your left hand, covering your hand from above at the time of the handshake, signifies an expression of care and concern.

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This is almost always true when shaking hands between people of different sex or age. At the same time, if you observe such a position of the hands when shaking hands between two men of approximately the same age and social status, then the situation may have an absolutely opposite meaning.

Also in this case, you need to pay attention to the context of the situation. If a person puts his palm on top immediately during a handshake, then, probably, we are talking about expressing deep positive feelings towards the interlocutor. If this gesture is formed as a response to any words or movements that have arisen already during the conversation (and the hands do not break contact at the same time), then, most likely, this indicates an attempt to show your ego, a desire to show who is in charge here.

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The handshake is executed in the manner of equal partners, but there are two nuances that indicate Obama's superiority. 1. Obama pats Yatsenyuk on the shoulder with his left hand. This is a gesture of invading the personal space of a communication partner. Yatsenyuk does not make similar attempts, which only enhances the effect of Obama's influence. 2. Yatsenyuk's back is so tense that it seems that he stretched out in front of Obama like a recruit in front of a sergeant. In general, the photo demonstrates Yatsenyuk's tension and his recognition of the higher status of his interlocutor. However, one should not get carried away with interpretations and assert that Yatsenyuk at the same time demonstrates some signs of submission. There is respect, there is tension in the posture, there is tightness, but there is no subordination in this photo

In addition, such a gesture can also occur as a result of a reaction to the unfriendly behavior of the interlocutor or his intrusion into the intimate area.

Is there a difference between the position of the palm below and above? Undoubtedly. The person with their palm underneath is more likely to provide whatever help and support you ask for. But a person, whose palm is on top, usually already perfectly understands what exactly you will need and will be useful at this moment and in this situation. That is, the difference between the position of the palms reflects the presence or absence of an initiative position. The palm underneath is a sign of acceptance of your initiative. The palm on top is a sign of readiness to show your own initiative.

This is not always the case. The position of the body can turn this interpretation upside down.

Touching the interlocutor. Close distance

A person can touch the interlocutor with his left hand both in the area of ​​the forearm and in the area of ​​the elbow joint. And in some cases, we place our hand on the shoulder or even hug the back of the person we are greeting.

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This is where the laws of distance come into force. The closer to the body of the body is the place where the hand of your interlocutor is fixed, the greater the need for communication he experiences. Touching the forearm and touching the shoulder have varying degrees of severity of those feelings. The most extreme is, of course, hugs. Well, or patting the interlocutor on the back.

Do not forget that hugs can also be subcultural. Young athletic people who greet each other with strong hugs do not always have too warm feelings for each other. Most likely, this type of greeting is a consequence of their own rituals. That's how it is with them. In any case, to assess the relationship of people by their handshake, one should take into account the context of the situation, the influence of cultural and social characteristics.

The strength and duration of the handshake

In addition to the handshake itself, several other factors are important.

1. The strength of the handshake. The harder they shake your hand, the more emotional energy the interlocutor is ready to pour into communication. At the same time, a sluggish handshake is not yet a sign of dislike. Maybe the person just feels bad. A strong handshake, respectively, is not always a sign of complacent disposition. The force of compression indicates only the willingness to spend a certain amount of muscle energy while communicating with you. But what the nature of the application of this energy will be depends on completely different factors.

2. The duration of the contact. There is a direct correlation with the time that the interlocutor is willing to spend on communicating with you. The longer he shakes your hand, the longer the conversation he expects. The shorter the handshake, the faster the opponent is ready to "resolve" all issues and do other, more important matters. Often, a short handshake indicates the desire of your interlocutor to quickly move on to resolving the issue for which you met. In this case, brevity will indicate a reluctance to waste time on formal procedures.

Interpretation errors

When you are engaged in the analytics of non-verbal communication, you understand that not a single gesture and not a single sign is one hundred percent reliable. Moreover, sometimes the same gesture in different situations can have an absolutely opposite meaning.

In order to make fewer mistakes in the interpretation of gestures (and it will not be possible to completely get rid of them), you always need to make allowances for the context of the situation, the peculiarities of the culture and social group, the combination of the gesture with posture and facial expressions. But the key features of the handshake remain unchanged in most cases.

The main thing:

1. A handshake expresses an attitude towards the interlocutor. And if in words a person can lie, then through a handshake the truth is much more likely to be correctly interpreted.

2. The distance for a handshake only means how much they intend to contact you. A short distance does not necessarily mean a positive disposition.

3. The harder they shake hands, the greater the desire to make contact. And the more emotions overwhelm your interlocutor.

4. The main signs of a formal handshake are: long distance, sluggish handshake, short time of hand contact. This indicates a lack of interest in communication.

5. If the left hand is used in the handshake, this is a sign that the other person is putting more personal relationship with you than in other cases and with other people.

I also propose to watch and try to analyze videos of real and interesting handshakes of President Petro Poroshenko with Catherine Ashton, Vladimir Putin, Nursultan Nazarbayev and Alexander Lukashenko in Minsk - using only the acquired knowledge.

And now - checking the conclusions. So, Ashton expresses support for Poroshenko by performing a "glove" handshake gesture, covering the top of the hand of the Ukrainian president. Poroshenko shows a positive attitude towards Ashton with a smile, but eye contact time with her is very short. Before the handshake with Ashton ends, his gaze already jumps to Putin.

The handshake with Putin is defiantly cold. Too abrupt, theatrical transition from a smile addressed to Ashton, to tense walking nodules and a petrified gaze addressed to Putin.

In the next second, the tension of Poroshenko's posture begins to subside and the duty handshake with Nazarbayev is already taking place under the auspices of a slight smile. And Lukashenka gets all the emotional stash from Poroshenko - a smile, and a turn of the body shoulder to shoulder, and a caring "glove" when shaking hands.

Conclusion - Poroshenko's coldness in relation to Putin is pretended, emphasized, somewhat exaggerated. And this was done in contrast to the smiles of other participants in the meeting specifically to emphasize the negative attitude towards him.

There is a version that with a handshake or hand movement resembling a handshake, our distant ancestors wanted to demonstrate that they had no weapons in their hands. In Russia, this method of greeting is most common among men; women usually use it only during business meetings.

There is a version that with a handshake or hand movement resembling a handshake, our distant ancestors wanted to demonstrate that they had no weapons in their hands. In Russia, this method of greeting is most common among men; women usually use it only during business meetings.

What does a handshake mean?
A handshake is a symbolic gesture that is used when greeting, saying goodbye, congratulating, concluding an agreement, or as a sign of reconciliation. This gesture consists of a slight squeezing of the right or left hands and may be accompanied by a slight swaying.

How should you shake hands?
When shaking hands with the person whom you have decided to greet in this way, you need to look directly in the eyes and not avert them, at least until you open your hands. Press your hand firmly, but without using force. Do not leave your palm open, your fingers should not hang in the air. The nature of the handshake can set the tone for all subsequent communication, so don't underestimate its importance.
It is usually not accepted to shake hands in the toilet, in the bathhouse, in the dining room. In the dining room, this especially applies to those cases when one person is already sitting at the table and eating, and the second is just coming up.

How to determine the character of a person by a handshake?
Many experts argue that a person's handshake can be used to determine his character.
So, for example, if a sluggish, lifeless hand was extended to you for a handshake, perhaps there is a person in front of you, possessing weak character and lack of self-confidence... Too strong handshake (until the fingers crunch) characterizes tough and aggressive person: he deliberately causes inconvenience and even pain, wanting to demonstrate his strength and ability to apply pressure.
Calm, balanced people with adequate self-esteem give the hand firmly enough, but not too hard. If you feel that the hand given in this way is very suitable for ours, in front of you self-confident person. He knows what he wants, but he also knows how to adapt to other people.
The manner of greeting with a "frozen", as if wooden, hand gives out a tough person who is not ready to meet halfway and requires others to adjust to him.
If the handshake resembles a grip and you have to jerk your hand a little to free yourself, it is likely that in front of you is - possessive person.
If a person not disposed to rapprochement, he can demonstrate a kind of truncated handshake: he gives his partner only the tips of his fingers, protecting his palm from the grip with his thumb. O striving to keep distance the opposite situation also says, when a person does not shake your outstretched hand completely, but only his fingers. Unwillingness to get close the person also demonstrates if he stretches his straight hand far forward, expanding the space between you.
When the hand is extended from the side in a wide gesture, this is a typical friendly handshake showing a certain closeness of relations, informality of communication... But this gesture contains a swing, which in a situation with an unfamiliar person can be regarded as aggression. If a person absolutely always exchanges such a handshake, it is likely that he rustic, not tactful enough, inclined to impose oneself.
However, the type of handshake may depend not only on the character of the person, not only on his attitude towards the interlocutor, but also on his mood at the moment, so sometimes you should not make hasty conclusions about his intentions.

Andrey Vetoshkin

What is the handshake talking about? Some people attach too little importance to the handshake: they do it somehow, without looking in the eyes and without enthusiasm.

And then they wonder why completely different guys turn out to be the favorites of the bosses, and they can't become the soul of the company.

As scientists have found out, half of the success of the conceived business depends on the correct touch of hands and accompanying gestures.

This tradition exists in many countries, however, each nation brings its own unique features and "chips" into it. Just what is the custom of African Masai to spit on their hands with relish before touching!

Muslims, after shaking hands, bring their hand to their very heart, and the Arabians kiss on both cheeks. And only to the Japanese, an outstretched hand in hope will hurt: it is customary for them to bow without invading their personal space.

The fact is that power,with which you shake hands and energy,which you transmit at the same time, able to tell a lot about your character to partner.

So, the tighter a man squeezes his hand, the stronger, it turns out, his sexual activity. Generally, shaking force will tell much about your health: the more Newtons, the less the likelihood of imminent death, stroke or heart attack.

It may seem to you that you yourself decide how to shake someone else's hand. But heredity decided everything for you a long time ago!

Turns out, children and grandchildren shake hands the same way, like fathers and grandfathers... These are all genetic characteristics. The stronger the squeeze, the better your genes are.

In addition, this gesture is influenced by character (introvert or extrovert), physical fitness, education and even ... nutrition.

How do business relationships begin?

Of course, with a handshake. Lethargic or cheerful, sincere or indifferent, bright or mean.

What does the partner's handshake mean? See how your hand is extended to you: palm down, up or strictly vertically, with an edge?

In a vertical layout a person subconsciously hopes for equal fruitful cooperation.

But giving a hand "face down", as if “fatherly” covering yours, he strives for leadership. Such a person will want to subdue you, he is clearly aiming at leaders.

If a man puts his hand palm up(as if asking for alms), he hints that he is ready to obey your instructions.

Maybe this is a modest, driven nature, or a person who is used to flattering, fawning and hiding behind someone else's back.

The formula for success

The look, smile and other gestures of the person standing on the opposite side are of great importance.

One scientist (his name is Jeffrey Beatty) put forward ideal handshake theory... If you want to make the right impression, study it carefully and practice in front of a mirror.

So, first meet the “enemy” eyes. This is followed by a lively greeting and a sincere smile. Only then vigorously reach out and squeeze your partner's palm firmly.

After two, maximum three seconds, break the handshake. Everyone wants to get rid of too long shaking of hands.

If your palm is sticky and wet, the handshake is sluggish and lifeless, and your eyes look to the side, you are unlikely to seem like a confident and reliable person to your interlocutor.

By the way, it is noticed that introverted natures always greet sluggishly... They are deep in themselves and pay little attention to worldly customs. Therefore, they are not reputed to be successful and active people in other people's eyes.

However, the Turks, Pakistanis, Africans and the inhabitants of the Middle East would like them very much: it is not customary there to squeeze someone else's hand tightly.

Little tricks of big people

You've probably noticed that some strangers fascinate you from the very first minute. Somehow they immediately dispose and become best friends in an hour.

Pay attention to the non-verbal gestures that started your acquaintance. Very often people, versed in psychology and eager to become pleasant conversationalists,use some tricks.

In addition to smiling and eye contact, when shaking hands, they can grasp your palm with two hands, squeeze it, or shake it slightly. Or, squeezing your hand with theirs, they will embrace you with another, pull you to them and pat you on the shoulder.

All these skin-to-skin contacts are recorded on a subconscious level as manifestations of friendly feelings. They shook the hand - and you do not like the soul in the interlocutor!

This shows openness, cordiality, and readiness for further contact. But even when shaking hands, people who consider themselves well-mannered adhere to certain rules regarding the question of who is the first to shake hands when greeting. What does etiquette prescribe?

Why is it customary to hold out your hand when you meet?

The custom of shaking hands at a meeting came to us from ancient times. Moreover, in each period of time, different meanings were attributed to this gesture. There is a hypothesis that in primitive tribes, a handshake among men was a kind of test of strength: whoever shakes the hand harder is stronger. Each meeting began with such a short duel. In some other tribes, a man's readiness to stretch out his hand showed the purity of his intentions: the hand is outstretched, the palm is open, there is no weapon in it, which means that there is no need to be afraid of this person.

In ancient Rome, people were good at cheating, and an outstretched hand did not always mean friendliness. The warriors learned to hide a small dagger in their sleeve, and with the usual handshake it could be overlooked. Therefore, the descriptions mention the custom of shaking the wrist rather than the palm. At first this was done for security purposes, then it became a tradition: when a man met, holding his hands at the level of the lower back, squeezed each other's wrists.

But in Japan, samurai shook hands before a fight, and this gesture told the enemy: "Prepare for death."

The meaning of a handshake today

In those distant times, people did not attach importance to who was the first to shake hands. It was only in the 19th century that the handshake became generally accepted and regulated by the rules of etiquette. Only men could shake hands with each other; this gesture was not peculiar to women and was considered tactless. Later, shaking hands became popular in business circles: they were sealed with deals, showed a disposition for further communication. Nowadays, there is nothing wrong with shaking hands with a lady, especially if it happens in a business setting.

The custom of shaking hands when meeting is more common in Europe and America. In Asia, however, it is less popular: there a bow or a certain folding of hands is considered a sign of respect. But in Asian business circles, a handshake is also appropriate.

when meeting

In most cases, a person cannot introduce himself: he must be presented. A man is supposed to be represented to a woman. Those who are younger in age - people who are older. A person occupying a higher position in society is introduced to a person who is at a lower level. This is considered an indicator of good manners. If you need to introduce your family to colleagues or friends, then they name your spouse and children, and in front of them they introduce friends or colleagues as a sign of respect for the older age. Who is the first to give a hand when they meet? It is the person to whom others are introduced, regardless of gender and age.

Can you introduce yourself?

Are there situations when it is appropriate for a person to introduce himself to strangers? Yes, it is possible, for example, at a business dinner, banquet, party with the aim of establishing. In this case, it is permissible to approach the person of interest, introduce yourself, name the field of activity and company and hold out a business card.

If you need to introduce yourself to a woman who is in the company of a man, then you should first get acquainted with her gentleman and then only be introduced to the lady.

Acquaintance is not just about shaking hands. A good-natured, disposing smile and a direct look into the face of the interlocutor are very important. It is considered bad form to look away while dating.

Several "no", or How not to be known as ignorant

Yes, yes, ignorance of these seemingly trifles can make a person ignorant in a matter of seconds. So, when meeting and at any meeting, according to generally accepted rules of politeness, you should not:

• do not shake the outstretched hand (this can be perceived as the deepest insult);
• when giving a hand, keep the other in your pocket;
• hold a cigarette in your hand (it is generally undesirable to hold anything in your hands, especially when shaking hands);
• leave a gloved hand when greeting a lady (a woman can leave a glove if it is part of a toilet; a glove, but not a mitten!);
• look around, at the floor or up, show indifference;
• when meeting a group of people, shake hands with only one of them;
• stay sitting when meeting a lady or an older person, especially if they are standing at the same time;
• do not know the simple rules about who is the first to shake hands.

Greetings when you meet unexpectedly

Almost hourly, we greet someone: neighbors to the saleswoman from whom we buy coffee every morning, colleagues, close or barely familiar people, relatives ... Who is the first to shake hands when greeting? How not to embarrass yourself or your interlocutor? Let's consider several cases.

If acquaintances meet on the street or in a public place, do not express your emotions too violently and attract the attention of others. Seeing a familiar person in the distance, you can limit yourself to a nod or wave of your hand. If the distance allows, a handshake and a short exchange of phrases are appropriate (you should not start a long conversation, because a person may be in a hurry somewhere). Who is the first to shake hands when meeting? Etiquette prescribes this initiative to someone who is older in age or occupies a more important social position.

At an unexpected meeting with a loved one, short hugs, pats, and in some countries even kissing on the cheek or a cheek-to-cheek gesture are appropriate. But if you have met a business partner, someone older than you, or a distant acquaintance, such displays of emotion can be regarded as familiarity.

Can a woman shake hands first?

Who is the first to shake hands, a man or a woman? only a lady can shake hands. A man is supposed to either shake the outstretched hand, or bring it to his lips for a kiss. In past centuries, it was permissible to kiss the hand of only a married lady, but in modern rules of good form there are no such restrictions.

Greetings from a barely familiar person

Should I greet barely familiar people? Yes! Even if you don’t remember the person’s name or cannot remember where you saw his face, it’s better to be polite and say hello. Of course, in this case, it is enough to say a greeting, nod, or raise your hat. Violent manifestations of joy will look unnatural, and therefore are completely unnecessary.

Greetings at a scheduled meeting

Let's say we are talking about a meeting of acquaintances at a party, in a restaurant, at a social reception, in a theater, any public place. This is not a chance meeting on the run, and when going to an event, a person knows who he will meet there. How should you behave and who is the first to give your hand when you meet? In this case, the one who is younger or occupies a lesser position is supposed to come up and say hello first. But when it comes to who is the first to shake hands - the elder or the younger - then the older one takes the initiative.

Welcome Guest Rules

Having come to visit, be sure to say hello to the owner of the house and the guests present. The owner should shake hands, and when greeting the others, you can limit yourself to a bow and greeting phrases. It is more appropriate for the hostess to kiss the hand.

When meeting with a group of people, it is not necessary to shake hands with everyone, a general bow is enough. But if you shook hands with one of these people, you should shake everyone else as well. Who is the first to give a hand in greeting in this case? The one who approaches the group. Before shaking hands, gloves should be removed, as well as a hat.

If you have to say hello to people sitting at the table, stretching your hand across the table is considered a sign of bad manners. It is more polite to limit yourself to a verbal greeting or a slight bow.

In a situation where people who greet each other have a noticeable age difference, the question often arises: who is the first to shake hands - the elder or the younger? The rules of etiquette state that only an older person can take the initiative to shake hands. The same rule applies to people at different levels of the career ladder: the one who is of higher rank extends his hand.

Business welcome rules

Business courtesy follows the same principles. The one who is lower in rank should be the first to greet. If a person enters a room where there is already a group of people, then the person entering greets first - regardless of position or age.

Who is the first to give a hand when greeting during a business communication? In reverse order, from top to bottom. We must not forget the general rule: shaking the hand of one person implies the same gesture towards other persons. Otherwise, you should limit yourself to polite words and a general nod of the head.

In the case when a subordinate enters the office of the chief, the latter may not interrupt his business or conversation, but according to the rules of politeness, he must greet the person who has entered with words or at least with a gesture. In the opposite situation, when the boss enters the subordinate, it is supposed to interrupt the conversation or business (if any, and this will not be incorrect in relation to a third party) and pay attention to the boss.

Let's summarize what has been said

Etiquette is a delicate matter, but quite logical, because all the rules of good manners are subordinate to one thing: not to offend another person, to behave in such a way that communication is mutually pleasant. If you happen to get confused in ranks and age, if you are afraid to seem impolite, accidentally offend, you should remember one more rule: the more polite will be the one who first shakes hands, who is the first to greet, who is the first to show attention. If you are in doubt whether to say hello or not - say hello, whether to stretch out your hand or not - stretch it out. Let you be known as a person who has forgotten any subtlety of etiquette, but you will show cordiality and respect.

But there is one simple scheme that helps to remember who is supposed to be the first to greet and who should be the first to shake hands according to etiquette. We greet according to the principle "from less to more" (the younger - with the elder, the subordinate - with the boss, the man - with the woman). We extend our hand according to the principle "from more to less", since a handshake is a kind of privilege, an honorable sign of attention, and this gesture is supposed to be made by a more "important" person (the elder extends his hand to the younger, the boss to the subordinate, the woman to the man).

In addition to the handshake, do not forget about the kind words of welcome, gestures and a friendly smile - an absolute trump card in any communication!

Shaking hands is accepted in the male environment, women for some reason rarely shake hands with each other. It turns out that this custom is not so simple, according to the manner and strength of the handshake, important conclusions can be drawn and significant information about a person can be obtained.

A handshake is a familiar welcome gesture, a sign of peacefulness and respect. Apparently, the tradition of shaking hands at a meeting arose in ancient times, when people who had no aggressive plans demonstrated that they had no weapons. This meaning has long been lost, and the habit of shaking hands has been preserved. The inquisitive minds of scientists have reached this area. In the process of studying, a lot of amazing facts emerged.

The smell of a handshake

It's not just animals that exchange smells. It turns out that with the help of handshakes we unconsciously study smells. This conclusion is based on the results of the experiment. 300 people were invited to the meeting. Some were greeted by shaking hands. Then the researchers followed the behavior of the test subjects using a hidden camera: the "handshakes" brought their hand to their nose twice as often as the others. Scientists have found that when hands touch, people exchange chemicals.

What you can learn when shaking hands

Scientists at the University of Alabama argue that the strength of the handshake can be used to judge the type of personality. they shake hands uncertainly and weakly, but they behave much more energetically, leaving a positive impression of themselves. By this gesture, you can determine the mood of the interlocutor. So, a person who gives his hand in such a way that it is on top, intends to control the situation. If the interlocutor holds out his hand with his palm up, he is ready to obey. The palms that meet vertically speak of the mood for an equal relationship.

One correct handshake is as effective as three hours of negotiations. Scientists striving to measure and classify everything in the world have built a formula for the ideal handshake. We will not bore you with unnecessary philosophizing - you are unlikely to use this knowledge in life. In general, the secret of success is simple: look into the eyes of the interlocutor, smile sincerely, shake hands firmly, without holding the palm of the other person for more than three seconds.

Scientists from Canada have proved that by the nature of the handshake, one can judge the health and biological age of a person. We do not know if you can use the information of Canadian experts, but the strength of a handshake of a person full of strength is 300 newtons, and each decrease in this indicator by 50 newtons increases the risk of death by 16%. The manner of shaking hands is inherited: 65% in this gesture are determined by genetics, 35% depend on upbringing and well-being. Psychologists are inclined to think that a vigorous handshake indicates good heredity.

Differences in tradition

The national characteristics of handshakes are much more varied than one might think. The Swedes shake hands the hardest of all, and Pakistani men shake the most sluggish handshake. For most Europeans, a firm handshake is considered good form, but in the Middle East and Turkey this is not accepted - well-mannered people only indicate a gesture with a weak squeeze of the palm. In Africa, a friendly disposition is demonstrated by shaking hands with both hands, but at the same time it is unacceptable to squeeze the hand tightly.

In some countries, the ritual changes depending on social status. In South Korea, the hand outstretched by the boss must be taken in both palms, and one hand can only be greeted with friends.

For Muslims, it is impossible to shake hands between a woman and a man, since Islam forbids touching a representative of the opposite sex if he is not your relative.

Residents of the UK rarely shake hands and almost never say goodbye like that. But the Germans and Swiss shake hands at every opportunity.

Tradition of Saudi Arabia: the owner of the house first shakes the guest's palm, then puts his left hand on his shoulder and kisses on both cheeks. In some Muslim countries, after shaking hands, it is customary to put your right hand to your heart. There are also very strange customs for us. For example, the Maasai living in Africa spit on their hand before serving it, while in the Congo they blow on their hands. The Japanese have an outstretched hand - a sign of aggression, in this country people bow to each other when they meet.

Handshake rules

This, seemingly, formality is important, because our first impression of a person often depends on a gesture. A handshake speaks eloquently about interest or, conversely, about complete indifference, to express weakness or confidence, to demonstrate sincerity or an intention to hide something. With this informative gesture, we send a subtle but powerful impulse about our intentions.

If you strive to make a favorable impression and create the right mood from the first seconds of communication, master the rules of handshaking.

• Evaluate the situation before you start extending your hand in greeting. There are no hard and fast rules, but there are some restrictions. For example, if a person is significantly older and higher than you in status, it is appropriate to wait for the first movement from his side. The same applies to communication with unfamiliar people. Keep in mind that a handshake is a special sign that should not be used in all cases without exception. Shake hands with people who are important to you, who are respected, and those you pay special attention to.
• A sluggish handshake is evidence of lack of will, lack of interest, or insecurity. A vigorous hand shake should not be overly strong. Your task is not to show strength, but to indicate a friendly disposition.
• Choose a distance not too large so that the interlocutor does not have the impression that you are pushing him away, but not too short, as if you want to pull the person close to you. This kind of hospitality will be appropriate when meeting with friends.
• Your palm should not be wet. Everyone is familiar with the sensation of touching a not entirely dry and cool hand. When going to an important meeting, wash your hands thoroughly and do not squeeze them. If you know about your problem and are not sure that you can keep your hands dry, it is better to use deodorant or put a dry napkin in your pocket to wipe your hand discreetly.
• When shaking hands, make eye contact so as not to give the impression of being dishonest or insincere.
• Never reach down with your palm down - this is a gesture of superiority that no one might like.
• A hand with the palm facing up indicates your willingness to obey.
• The optimal number of shaking hands in a handshake is three, but never extend the greeting to more than seven.
• If a hand is extended to you when you are sitting, stand up - this will show respect for the person.
• When greeting each other with a handshake, men should take off their gloves, regardless of the weather. Women, according to the rules of etiquette, may not take off their gloves on the street, but indoors and they bare their hand.
• Politicians often use the “Glove” handshake, in which one of the interlocutors grasps the palm of the other with both hands. This demonstrates openness and purity of intentions. However, when getting to know each other, you should not use the Glove, as this technique causes the opposite effect - people are alarmed and reluctant to make contact.
• The right hand is intended for a handshake, this rule works even for left-handers. But if your right hand, for example, is stained, you can stretch your left, explaining the reason for this behavior.
• When a woman and a man meet, according to the rules of etiquette, the first hand, if desired, is extended by the woman.
• When people of different ages meet, the elder decides whether there will be a handshake.
• When introduced, the first person to shake hands is the one who was introduced.
• If someone reaches out to you, the rules of good manners are to respond to a greeting. Ignoring a hand hanging in the air is considered an insult.
• As you approach a group of people you know, shake hands with everyone in the room.
• In order not to get confused when two couples meet, use the following rule: traditionally, women stand to the right of men, and they shake hands first, then men, after which men can shake hands.

Remember that it is completely unacceptable to greet everyone by shaking hands. This greeting can be compared to addressing "you" to loved ones and "you" to everyone else.