How to tell a guy to pause. A pause in a relationship: what is it, how to behave, initiated by a girl or boyfriend. How to take a break from a relationship

In your love, at first everything was fine, then quarrels began, in the end the man offered to pause the relationship and take a break from each other. Why and what to do about it?

Possible reasons for a pause in a relationship initiated by a man

the woman loved him too much, straight to the point of nausea, and he wants to distance himself in order to understand if he can feel the attraction again;

the woman got him with her tantrums, reproaches, alterations and crazy gash. He can no longer tolerate constant quarrels. With distance, he tries to make her calm down and think with her head, or is simply afraid to do stupid things in the heat of the moment;

stress. A difficult situation at work or in personal life forces some men to distance themselves from everyone in order to digest everything and decide how to move on. This is how a man struggles with stress, and here he needs support in the form of a calm woman's reaction. But more often than not, a difficult situation is just an excuse, but in fact he wants to end this relationship;

the dullness of everyday life saddened him, he wanted romance, but for some reason it ended in these relations, none of the couple wants to create it, the man chooses to suspend the relationship in order to get at least some emotions and think;

a man is disappointed in a woman, no longer sees her as a life partner (or has never seen and it is time to end the initially unnecessary relationship);

he fell in love with another. Pauses the relationship in order to have more opportunities to calmly care for a new passion and take a closer look at her before leaving completely;

he is tired of these relationships, has fallen out of love, and hopes that he will have time to find someone better for himself, while the woman will be his alternate airfield during this break, just in case;

he wants to leave, but is afraid to take responsibility for this and take a decisive step, and expects the woman to start hysteria and behave inappropriately. In this case, with a clear conscience, he will sever the relationship completely, or the woman herself will do it;

if a woman does not start hysteria, but waits for him faithfully, faithfully, then it will be possible to have an affair with two women at the same time, and rush about until one of the women gets tired of it.

That is, most likely he decided to end the relationship, and one step away from that. There is no point in either hysteria or sitting at the window waiting for his return.

How to be a woman during a pause in a relationship

calmly agree: "As you want", and, if possible, immediately stop communicating, leave his home, or ask him to pack his things and go to another apartment, if your home. But if the apartment is shared, or you rent it and pay in half, it is advisable to find ways to leave, or somehow stop warm communication;

treat a pause as parting... You were clearly told that they were tired of you and wanted to rest. Your pride will tell you the right behavior, although the desire to cling to a man can seriously confuse your cards. Do not give in, self-respect is the most attractive quality that can only be in a woman;

do not make an offended face, do not be hysterical and don't panic. This is not the end of the world. Nothing is eternal. Any relationship may end one day, but then new ones will begin, often better than the previous ones. And who knows how you will remember the previous ones: with a smile, bewilderment or regret that you have ever gotten involved in them;

do not contact him even if he writes himself. Let it miss you as it should, and assess the real risk of being left without you. If you chat with him, make claims and ask him to restore relations, then not only will he not have time to get bored, but he will even more want to part with a woman who does not value herself at all. You can answer something at least to declarations of love and invitations to meet, but even better - to a request to forgive him and return the relationship;

think about him as little as possible and grind this situation in my head. The more you think, the more you attach yourself to it. So you can bring yourself to the point of begging to restore the relationship on any conditions. But in this case, you will definitely not be happy in them ...

put yourself in order... It is better not to start yourself initially. It is much more difficult to refuse beautiful ones, and it will be easier for you to restore your self-esteem;

pump yourself up as a successful person... And it is better to always do this, both in relationships, and before them, and without them. It is even more difficult to give up successful ones than beautiful ones. The richer, more beautiful, healthier, more popular and higher on the social ladder you are, the more you will have a choice of interesting men. Have you noticed that only in the cinema do princes marry servants, and in life interesting men are looking for an equal? Have you noticed how strongly you cling to people if your ex after breaking up has become much cooler? Think about it, make the right conclusions, and then in this whole situation you will definitely win;

get yourself some new hobbies... It is desirable that they also pump your personality, and also give you the opportunity to meet interesting men. Learn English, go to the gym, take business courses, and ride your bike. Take your life as much as possible, do not torment yourself with thoughts about what your almost former man is doing now;

remember that people enter into relationships to enjoy and delight each other... And not in order to solve other people's problems and entertain another. Analyze your behavior, at what point you lost your own joy and began to be sad, where you stopped being strong and radiant and gave up weakness. A man can decorate your life, but no one can make you happy except yourself;

communicate more with old and new friends that you probably dropped during your relationship. It is better not to be alone for a minute at all, so as not to yearn for the days gone by, which, most likely, will never return;

set yourself up for dating other men... And not only to set up, but also to get acquainted on the street, in shopping centers, and especially in the process of doing interesting things together. This was discussed in the paragraph about hobbies;

arrange a professional photo session with the help of a stylist, it will raise your self-esteem. In addition, professional photos will be useful to you if the relationship with this man does not resume and you go to look for another on a dating site;

it is better not to post anything on your social networks... It is important for you not to wait for likes and reactions from a man, and do not expect anything at all, otherwise you will fall in love with him even more. The more you think about him, the worse it is for you, and the less likely you are to behave correctly when he wants to return;

if for a couple of weeks a man does not show signs of life, consider that this is the end... Do not write to him or remind him of yourself. If he has already forgotten about you - nothing can be done about it. Just sign up on a dating site and start dating.

Women's mistakes during a pause in a relationship on a male initiative

Blame yourself for everything. A relationship is created by two, and both take responsibility. It can get cold for a variety of reasons. There are reasons hidden from you. For example, he fell in love with another, but you do not know. Or has never been in love with you, just got a little carried away from boredom and now cooled down. Or you turned out to be the wrong people for each other. Or someone turned him against you, and he is too led, like a calf on a leash. Or he just fell out of love, the tomatoes wilted, it happens. Or, in principle, he is not ready for responsibility and wants to walk for another fifty years. Or ... It doesn't matter anymore.

Continue to live with him. The relationship is temporarily over, but you live together. Because you are afraid to leave him or expel him, suddenly he will not return. By staying with him, you do not give him the opportunity to realize that he can actually lose you. He sees that you are not going anywhere.

Write, call, beg to return. Try to dot it, ask how he treats you, clarify the situation, explain that he can lose you and what paiza means for you to break up. Everyone has the right to choose those people with whom he is good, and by imposing this right on him, you do not leave him. And you shouldn't sweeten him the bitter pill of existence without you. In addition, if you do this obsessively and unworthily, then it is for this reason that he can finally part with you - he will find in this a sufficient justification for himself.

Answer his calls and messages. You are tired of him, do you understand? Has shit in the soul, and wants to continue to communicate as if nothing had happened. In order not to lose control of you. Since you are already tired, let him have a good rest, so that it would be discouraging to solve all problems with “pauses”. No communication to him! Until he catches you somewhere and begs forgiveness. By the way, there will be a separate article on how exactly you need to forgive the naughty person in order to prevent his further mischief. Therefore, subscribe as you like: in VKontakte, or in Telegram, or, and don't miss this creation.

Of course, if he suggested a time-out in a relationship because of your big joint, for example, you gave him horns or beat his mom, then this point does not apply to you. But here we are discussing a situation without a serious female offense. And we do not consider cases when he simply moved away because of his real personal life problems.

Maintain friendly communication with him, hoping for a renewal of relations. The man also lacks your warmth, care, heart-to-heart talk. If you continue to be friends with him, then the chances of returning the relationship become extremely small. He will find sex with another girl, and he will be “friends” with you. Little by little, he will replace communication with you with communication with other people, and finally get out of your horizon.
Don't lighten the severity of the separation. Cut off communication abruptly and completely! Let him feel in all its glory the depth of the hole that formed in his soul after you left, then he may want to return you.

Have sex with him. Even occasionally it is impossible. This kills the woman, her hopes and expectations are sharpened: "Now he will definitely remember what kind of super-duper I am and want to return." He already remembers everything perfectly, and sex cannot return a relationship. If you really want to make friends with organisms, find for this a more suitable partner who will love you, create a real relationship with him and after that do whatever you both like.

Congratulate him on the holidays. You can't even have a happy birthday. The person wants to take a break from you, have pride and do not interfere with him! Then chances are that he will again feel attracted to you.

Secretly or openly follow his every step. Apart from pain, you are unlikely to get anything else. You risk falling into the strongest dependence on living his life instead of your own. I would like to see his page on social networks for the hundredth time - spend this energy on your pleasant affairs, taking care of yourself and your loved ones. And put your new gorgeous photo in a contact, and block it so as not to wait for likes.

Set up "random" meetings. This way he will never get bored, especially if he suspects that you are doing it on purpose. And he is not a fool and he will definitely understand this, be sure. And then everything was gone.

To abandon yourself and your interests. Stop caring for yourself, get depressed, become like death. Manipulative women sometimes do this in order to show a man when they meet him what she has become without him, what he has done to her. They think that the man realizes what a goat he is, regrets his departure and, at least out of guilt, will return. In fact, he will not feel anything but pity and disgust for the downward woman. And pity is a mixture of contempt and disgust, love did not stand nearby. Do you really need it?

Post painful notes and pictures on your social networks. About the fact that you miss a person and cannot tell him about it, about the betrayal of people, loneliness, longing and sadness. And other stuff. Ugh!
You will not achieve anything by this, except that you will push him even more, and drive yourself deeper into depression. Now you only need something that charges you with a positive, including your page on the social network.

Trying to play on his jealousy. Post photos with men and expect a reaction, hint that you are no longer alone and it's your turn, upload photos with flowers, and so on. He perfectly sees that this circus is for him, and feels disgust that you cannot exist without a man and are ready to rush to the first one you come across. And even if it works at the very least and he wants to return, he will always remember that you are just about ready to hang on the neck of another. Relationships will definitely not get stronger from this.

Urgently rush into a new relationship in spite of the "almost former". If love, then please. And if just out of spite, then you risk being completely disappointed in life. It will be almost impossible to regain the past relationship. A new unloved man will not bring happiness, and an unplanned pregnancy from him can become the icing on the cake. It will be very difficult to get out of this.

Behaving unworthily. Blackmailing children, threatening suicide or murder, chopping a car to pieces, wreaking havoc in the apartment, throwing his things out of the window, sticking needles in his door or throwing poop in there, pouring acid on his new girlfriend or himself, and so on.
He will understand that he was in a relationship with a mentally ill, from whom he urgently needs to get away with his legs, and you risk being thrown into a prison or psychiatric hospital.

It's definitely better to stay away from the girl in this video. And problems with the law are guaranteed to her, and the guy calmly sat down and went, he doesn't care about her:

If you really want to take revenge, do it subtly: become even happier, richer and more beautiful without him , let him rage.

Do not be afraid that a man will "be offended" by your ignorance and will not return. He himself took a break, let himself get out of it himself. If he suddenly feels even a small desire, he will definitely let you know about it, do not even hesitate. If he doesn't write or call, be sure, he just doesn't want it. And even if he writes something, it is not always from great love, more often just from nostalgia and boredom. Therefore, there is no need to answer the first SMS, then his desire can grow and get stronger.

If you have followed all the recommendations in the article and the man wants to return to you, and you agree, keep in mind that your relationship needs to be worked out properly. If once they have already cracked, and the reason has not been eliminated, then they will surely crack again. Therefore, here you can contact me for advice in order to correctly restore your pair and strengthen it.

For those who want to bring their relationship with a man to a new level of love and happiness, and finally marry him on HIS initiative, my husband and I have created a free Quest for Happy Brides. We are conducting it on Vkontakte. I developed the quest classes based on my experience in consulting and bringing women to a result since 2014. It includes only the simplest and most effective, follow the link and sign up for free!

And here is an interview with one of the girls I helped get married in coaching. The results are impressive and inspiring! She also generously shares her secrets;)

“Temporary separation strengthens the relationship,” I think you've heard that saying? But is this true? In reality, parting only helps to better evaluate and understand the depth and strength of one's own feelings, but whether the result of a temporary separation will be a strengthening of relations or they will stop - depends on many circumstances.

A break in the relationship can arise due to natural reasons - forced departure, business trip, etc. But is it worth creating such circumstances artificially? - Yes, sometimes it is impossible to do without it, but such a need does not always arise.

If everything is okay in a relationship, I would not advise you to take a break just to "test your feelings." There is no need for this, and temporary artificial separation will do more harm than good. But sometimes a break in a relationship is the last resort to keep it going.

It happens that your communication reaches the stage where partners feel the need for some space and the need to "take a break", in the belief that such a break will strengthen their connection. Let's see if taking a break is helping to keep the relationship going or not.

Taking a break is not an alternative to clearing up controversial issues. If problems exist, they will bother you even after you meet again.

When you love someone very much, you tend to expect that the object of your love should respond to you with a feeling no less powerful and deep than yours. This is the main source of all troubles, and is called by a simple word - "selfishness". Over time, the couple begins to take each other for granted, and gradually their selfishness takes a dominant position in relation to love. As a result, doubts arise -? When that moment comes, you need to talk frankly and sort things out before you decide, or take a break to define your feelings.

What is a relationship break for?

Whether you like it or not, any relationship with other people always requires a compromise. Only uncompromising, because you don't know each other well enough to see the flaws yet. Not even so - to be more precise, at the very beginning of a relationship based on falling in love, the visible flaws of your partner do not start to annoy. Your hormonal state blocks any negative perception, although with your “mind” you understand and “see” everything.

As the relationship develops, the hormonal background decreases, the mind takes over the feelings, the first quarrels arise, there are reasons for resentment, misunderstanding is increasingly manifested - it is your ego that comes into conflict with love for another person.

It is very difficult to "sort out" your own feelings, because the "irritant" (partner) is always present in your living space, and you do not have time to become aware of the deep mental processes that are taking place inside you. In this case, it makes sense to take a short break to get an opportunity to forgive and forget your partner's mistakes, as well as to reflect on and critically evaluate your own behavior.

So, here are a few reasons for taking a break from your relationship:

• If you've just started dating, but one of you is moving too fast, starting to show the first signs of a demand for mutual commitment, you can talk about a break in the relationship. This will help you not only assess the chances of being together again, but also understand how compatible you are as a couple.
• If you have a misunderstanding in small things, for example, when both of you can do something, but at the same time each of you thinks that this “something” should be done by the other. Very often, it is around such trifles that the first conflicts flare up. Finally, you may just get bored with spending time with each other. Common topics of conversation disappear, and any discussion turns into an argument. All this is also a hint that it would be nice to take a break in the relationship.
• If your partner does not give you enough living space, wants to tie you to himself, for no reason becomes suspicious, talk to him and try to explain that trust is the basis of any relationship. Trust is an important factor in building a healthy relationship, and if you can't build trust, it may be best to take a break.
• As already mentioned, any relationship requires a compromise on both sides. But if you feel that only you are compromising, and your partner does not, then you will inevitably feel resentment and bitterness, which does not contribute to a normal relationship at all. If you are at this stage, it is best to talk to your partner and explain to him your point of view on the situation. Do not rush to part forever, perhaps something only seems to you or your partner has never thought about his behavior. A pause will give you both an opportunity to rethink a lot of things.

How to take a break from a relationship?

By taking a break from a relationship, you can save it from ruin. Taking a break does not mean that you abandon your partner and are going to try your luck with someone else. It also doesn't mean that you both don't love each other anymore and are going to break up forever. You just give yourself a little time to rethink the problems and questions that forced you to take a break.

During the break, try to keep yourself busy, spend more time in company than alone, and try to see your partner less often. Instead of feeling frustrated with the current situation, try to soften any negative feelings you have and be optimistic about continuing the relationship.

When you feel that you cannot find a common language with your partner, be sure to discuss it openly so that both you and he are aware of the problem and the related experiences. There is no point in taking a break without such a discussion, because the problems will remain. If the discussion does not lead to any solution, only then there is a reason to think about the least - a break.

It is important to make it clear to your partner that a break in a relationship is not a breakup forever, so that he does not understand your desire to take a break, as an excuse to break up. This can be a very difficult job, so be delicate and careful. Discuss your common problems, interests, talk about what brings you closer, what divides or worries. Convince yourself and convince each other that after a certain time you will be together again, there is simply no other way out now, and you are taking a break in order not to lose each other. Come to a common understanding and stick to your commitments.

How long should the break be?

FROM THE AUTHOR: My answers in the comments are the opinion of a private person and not a recommendation from a specialist. I try to answer everyone without exception, but unfortunately I physically do not have time to study long stories, analyze them, ask questions about them and then answer in detail, and I also do not have the opportunity to accompany your situations, because this requires a huge amount of free time, and I have very little of it.

In this regard, I very much ask you to ask specific questions on the topic of the article, do not expect that I will advise in the comments or accompany your situation.

Of course, you can ignore my request (which many do), but in this case, be prepared for the fact that I may not answer you. This is not a matter of principle, but exclusively of time and my physical capabilities. Don't be offended.

If you want to receive qualified assistance, please, contact for advice, and I will devote my time and knowledge to you with full dedication.

Best regards and hope for understanding, Frederica

How to pause a relationship and how to behave

Taking a break in a relationship is often the only right decision for two people. The main thing is not to turn the break into torture with sleepless nights and endless torment. A competent thaum-out will help put everything in its place and will not cause additional discord between loving people. Do I need to pause in a relationship and how to behave during this period?

1. Do not part with loved ones?
2. Obvious - probably
3. Pause - a lifeline
4. Work on bugs
5. Rules and taboos for timeouts

Not to part with your loved ones?

Proven: Even the strongest couples go through tough times. But some families "gently" move to a new stage of relations, while others - part with loud scandals and consolidate the status of an enemy to each other. It is surprising that after stormy partings, love does not disappear for many, but turns into torment and doubt. But ... the points are set, the conclusions are drawn, and pride forbids showing weakness. Alas, an illiterate timeout in a relationship is often the beginning of the end.

It happens in another way. In an effort to preserve the union, the halves do their best to please each other, try to avoid conflicts. Outwardly, everything looks perfect, and the internal tension gradually grows and in one day spills out. The ending can be unpredictable.

The obvious is probably

Psychologists say: pause in a relationship is sometimes not just necessary, but extremely important! But such a decision should not be spontaneous, but mutually meaningful.

To begin with, one must accept the fact that crises of "varying degrees of severity" are experienced by all couples. In the list of dangerous periods:

First year of relationship. At this time, loving people adapt to each other, get to know partners (and themselves) in new perspectives. Not everyone can stand the test of everyday life.
Birth of a child. It would seem that the happiest stage in family life for many turns into quarrels, scandals, reproaches. A constantly tired wife requires help, her husband lacks attention.
The crisis is 15 years old. Spouses usually come to him as a full-fledged family with a "baggage" of skills, a well-established way of life and ... some cooling, bordering on habit.

Add to this financial difficulties, lack of their own housing, fleeting connections - and there are dozens of reasons for parting.

Is a pause a lifeline?

In most cases, yes.

Time-out in a relationship helps to cool down, look at abandoned phrases from a different angle, think about the situation and draw the right conclusions.

But in no case - do not engage in self-flagellation and do not look for new reasons to accuse your partner! Otherwise, the pause will quickly grow from a lifeline into a new lump of resentment with mutual accusations.

A relationship break is useful in such cases:

You need to understand yourself. Living with another person, we often put our goals in the background and after a while we stop seeing the whole picture of the future. On the face of it - the crisis of self-determination, which usually face young families before the birth of children.
There are doubts. They can relate to the choice of a partner, the possible loss of freedom, an open relationship with another person ... To dispel them, it takes time, distance from the object of passion and a cold mind.
Feelings have lost their sharpness. Ups and downs are natural companions of any relationship. But if for a long period people are absolutely indifferent to each other, feel irritated, it is better to live separately and understand whether this is a temporary phenomenon or the beginning of an inevitable end.

Many are subconsciously afraid of a timeout, have no idea how to survive a pause in a relationship, and are wary of a final break. But the statistics say: after meaningful breaks, most couples keep the union.

Work on bugs

The hardest part is keeping the mind cool when emotions are at their peak. However, without this, it is unlikely that it will be possible to "sort out" the situation and understand yourself. There are many questions to be answered, and the main thing will not be "Who is to blame?", But "What is to be done?"

Before blaming your partner for everything, you should analyze your words and actions. Not sure if you can do it on your own - see a psychologist.

It is important to know: women and men react differently to crises in the family. Representatives of the fair sex prefer to resolve issues at the negotiating table, their partners often withdraw into themselves and deny any attempts to reach out to the truth. Putting pressure on a man and trying to squeeze answers out of him is pointless. It is more correct to wait until he is "ripe" for communication. Raising voice, reproaches, constant questions are the worst enemies on the road to reconciliation. The main task of partners is to express their thoughts and listen carefully to each other.

Timeout rules and taboos

Many couples "run away" precisely because they do not know how to keep a pause in the relationship. In order not to provoke a new round of showdown, initially negotiate with your partner the "rules" of the timeout:

Explain its reasons and the importance of such a step,
set the approximate pause time,
choose a time to talk on the phone.

No matter how difficult it is to adhere to these rules, you will have to do it. This will show mutual respect for each other. The first days will have to fight with an irresistible urge to call.

This is especially true for women who are used to taking care of a boyfriend (husband) or want to control their halves. Outbursts of jealousy on both sides are not excluded.

How to sustain a pause in a relationship with a man or woman? Often this question turns out to be overwhelming for loving people. A psychologist will help you painlessly go through a difficult period, who will understand the reasons for what is happening and offer an optimal "action plan" to overcome the crisis.

The union of each couple undergoes not only periods of boundless happiness, mutual understanding and love. At a certain stage, discontent, conflicts, resentments arise. The moment comes when you need to make a decision about your future destiny: to deal with difficulties and move on or disperse. But some couples choose the third option, which seems more humane and simpler - a break in the relationship.

But before deciding on it, you should be prepared for a variety of results. For some partners, a temporary rest from each other will help refresh past feelings and re-ignite passions, while for others it will be the beginning of the end.

When can a couple decide to take a break?

Frequent conflicts

Comes in every pair. Constant quarrels require a lot of mental strength. If relations are tense to the limit, and conflicts arise out of the blue, it is necessary to look for the cause of the current situation. You cannot live in constant negativity and opposition. It kills feelings and alienates people from each other.

Sexual and emotional satiety

If a man and a woman get bored with each other in everyday life and in bed, if there are no common interests and goals, this is one of the reasons for parting. A relationship that only lasts for sex cannot last long. Passions gradually subside, and the unknown and alluring becomes mundane and dull. Only real feelings can save the day. Sometimes it takes a temporary break to test their strength.

If you want to end the relationship

Many psychologists agree that the proposal for a temporary break is made by people who have a subconscious or conscious desire to break up. They are either afraid to say this directly, or they reserve the right to think privately about the correctness of their decision. The gradual reduction of a relationship to nothing is perhaps the most painless breakup.

How can a break in a relationship help?

How do you know that you love? Separate for a while. After all, it is not for nothing that they say that parting is like the wind for a fire for love: it blows the strong, and extinguishes the weak. Bored and thinking about a person, you realize how dear and loved he is.

A temporary breakup can relieve accumulated stress and fatigue. Seething emotions are not the best assistant in sorting out relationships and resolving conflicts. Sometimes, left alone, the understanding comes that the existing problems are insignificant, and there are simply no reasons for quarrels and disputes. There is an opportunity to realize your mistakes and find compromises.

Why is a break in a relationship dangerous?

Timeout does not help solve the problem. Rather, it is used to avoid difficulties, refusal to work on oneself. It seems that after parting for a while, conflicts will disappear, and the relationship will start from scratch. But this is not the case. If there is a problem, it needs to be addressed. If the partners or one of them do not want to change, then a temporary separation will act only as a catalyst for a break.

Perhaps the most difficult and unpleasant situation arises when one, overestimating his own feelings, decides to return to a couple, and the other decided to leave. What should be done in this case? No one has control over the feelings and desires of another person. Beliefs, persuasions and threats will not return the relationship to its former harmony and romance. Of course, you can't pre-tune yourself to the negative, but you always need to know that life goes on. And everything that happens is just a step forward, for the better.

How to properly organize a timeout

Having decided to take a break from each other and put your thoughts and feelings in order, it is very important to define the rules for the break. It is necessary to discuss the boundaries of what is permissible with your partner in order to avoid unpleasant surprises and misunderstandings. In general, conversations are beneficial to any relationship, and their absence is the main one. And it is worth clarifying the following points:

• Timeout time frame. Usually two to three weeks are sufficient. This is the optimal period for rethinking the value of relationships. A longer separation with insufficient strength of feelings will increase the cooling that has arisen between a man and a woman.
• Features of communication. Can I call and text each other during the break, and if so, how often? The most effective break will be with the complete exclusion of contacts, but each couple chooses the conditions that are convenient for themselves.
• Relationships with the opposite sex. Are meetings with other people possible? What boundaries cannot be crossed in relations with them? Some couples temporarily break up and allow each other to live a fulfilling life with absolutely no restrictions. But then it's worth considering. If your partner wants an intimate relationship with another person, isn't this a clear signal?

Sometimes a short separation occurs on its own. This can be a separate vacation, the need to leave for a while to relatives. This opportunity to be alone, but staying in a relationship, allows you to think about and overestimate a lot. At the same time, the feelings of the other partner will not be hurt by the phrase "we need to take a break from each other."

If you're looking for an excuse to break up, it's best to tell your partner directly. There is no need to indulge him with illusions about a joint future. If it takes time to think, to put thoughts and feelings in order, take time out. But do not forget to discuss the terms of the break to the smallest detail.

Unfortunately, most relationship breaks end. But there are also exceptions. Love, mutual respect and mutual understanding will allow you to cope with any difficulties and trials that arise in the life of a couple. If people value each other, they don't need a break to realize it.

Remember the words from the song: "People meet, people fall in love, get married ..." - as soon as you start building a serious relationship with a man, you can imagine something like this development of events, but ...

Sudden: "Let's take a pause", as if poured with ice water, returns you from heaven to earth and the question arises: "How should I react to this and what to do next?" This is what I want to tell you in this article.

Calmness. Only calmness!

Such news will unsettle any woman. Rational thinking turns off, emotions turn on and this leads to destructive actions. Therefore, first you need to exhale and pull yourself together.

A pause in a relationship is not a final break. If it happened, you need to accept the situation and realize why you need to go through it. Your task is to assess what is happening as rationally as possible and learn a lesson.

Why does a man ask for a pause? Types of checks

So why does a man ask for a pause? Let's figure it out!

1. Pause check.Perhaps your chosen one sees you as an ideal woman for creating a family and thus wants to test your sincerity and interest in him. There is an option that he simply does not trust you, and wants to make sure of your feelings and the prospects of this relationship. In both scenarios, the outcome can be completely unpredictable, and the stories do not always end with a happy ending.

2. A pause due to forced necessity.In this case, circumstances force the man to take a break in the relationship. It can be work, business, family - any life crisis that can deprive him of his usual way of life and lead him out of his comfort zone. Then the man just needs to put the relationship on the back burner in order to immerse himself in the solution of an emergency. This does not mean that he has stopped loving you or that he has another. It's just that men are designed so that they can focus on one thing.

3. Pause because of doubts about you.At some point, you made a mistake and offended your partner. The degree of trust is lowered, the man begins to be cautious and reconsider the relationship. Perhaps you can guess why this is happening.

• If so, it is necessary to resolve the conflict before it leads to a disaster.
• If you do not understand why your partner has changed his attitude towards you, sit down and think. There is a reason and you need to find it, disassemble it and try to resolve the misunderstanding with your partner.

4. Pause due to self-doubt.The man is not sure that he is ready to immerse himself in a relationship with all that it implies. He doubts the need to take responsibility and build a family. He is simply not ready for a serious relationship and is afraid that they will change his usual way of life.

Important! Relationships after a pause are not always possible to restore, so try not to make sudden maneuvers that can lead to an accident. Only as a last resort, draw your sword, otherwise you risk destroying everything that has been built for so long. .

When a man pauses, never do this ...

If the situation turns in such a way that a pause in the relationship is inevitable, never - hear, never! - don't do this:

• Imposing yourself.Daily calls, letters, sms, looking for a meeting through acquaintances and friends will only add fuel to the fire and turn the man away from you. Give him what he asks for - some freedom and time to assess what is happening.
• A new relationship for show.Do not try to get your partner's attention with ostentatiousness. You do not need to demonstrate your new men and relationships with them, as this will only worsen the situation.
• Manipulation.You don't need to go to extremes and get your way through manipulation. Do not threaten him, do not try to press on pity or cultivate in him a sense of guilt. It will not help the cause in any way. And even if you continue to build relationships, they will not last long.
• Completely disappear from sight.You need to find the right balance between aggressive pressure and complete inaction. It is necessary to maintain communication, but unobtrusively and benevolently. Turning off negative emotions completely and refraining from sorting out the relationship is the key to harmonious communication.

Think! There is no need to indulge in despair and shed tears into the pillow. The coin has two sides, so use the time you spend apart for yourself.

How to make time work for you

In any situation, you need to look for positive moments. They are always there, just hidden behind emotions and not visible to the naked eye. So what to do when your man pressed STOP in a relationship?

• Exhale and wait.This does not mean that you need to guard the phone and leave everything to read the next message on the social network. Sit down and think about what you would like to do? Do you have a hobby? Then dive into it, hone your skills. Or maybe you have always dreamed of a new job or career advancement? It's time to show your management that you deserve more. Don't forget to meet friends, family, and loved ones as well. Or take a trip to see the world and show yourself to it.The main thing is not to get hung up on parting and move on.
• Think about whether this is your man.Indeed, immersed in a relationship, we are guided by emotions and completely lose our minds. When everything is good and the thought does not arise: "Is this my man?" It's time to dive into yourself and find the answer to this question.
• Chat with other men.Do not deprive yourself of the attention of other men. Chat! Make contacts. It is always useful, interesting and exciting. Who knows, maybe one day an innocent adventure will define your life once and for all ...
• Maintain contact even during a break.Sometimes, no more than 1-2 times a week, remind your man of yourself. A simple but interesting message is more than enough. If you got in touch with him first, stay quiet and wait. The next move is behind him.

These are simple yet effective guidelines that always work. Follow them and you will find how your life has been filled with new, bright and rich colors. By the way, a man is not always the initiator of a temporary break. It happens that a woman makes such a turn. Is it correct? Let's figure it out.

The pause was initiated by me ...

If you are thinking about taking the initiative and taking a break from your relationship, think twice. Harmonious relationships do not tolerate fuss. There is no need to race at full steam ahead of the locomotive. There is no need to build a relationship at the pace of your partner. Only you define the boundaries and only you can decide how fast to love, how deep to dive in a relationship, and how often to do it.

Instead of an epilogue

You know, relationships are like wine. The longer they ripen, the richer and brighter the aftertaste will be. Therefore, the best option for accepting or not accepting the relationship in which you are, and the man with whom you build them, is to make a decision FOR YOURSELF. How, how fast and how far are you ready to go? Is it worth wasting your time at all? The choice is yours.